Forgotten Past
by Kitsune Hanyou
Summary: A ranch hand from 11 years ago returns to Virginia City, which sends Ben, Adam, Hoss, and even Hop Sing into a panic. Joe knows that it's because something bad happened to him, but he can't remember what.
1. His Return

Forgotten Past  
  
By: Miranda Rochelle Inc  
  
Chapter 1: "His" Return  
  
Joseph Cartwright strolled down the street of Virginia City, on his way to the Bucket O' Blood saloon. His two older brothers, Adam and Hoss were at the general store, gathering the supplies for the ranch. He had been sent to complete other errands, like gather the mail, send a telegram, and a few other things. With all of his errands completed, he decided to relax before his brothers joined him. His brothers were always hassling him because he was the youngest. Eighteen years of age was old enough to go have a beer! He couldn't understand why they gave him so much grief about it!  
  
It was a rather cold day, so the streets were practically empty. One of the few people on the street, an older man, about Joe's father's age, walked up to the boy. "Joseph Cartwright?" He asked. A nice black hat covered head, but the hair that he could see under the hat was as gray as Ben's and his eyes were a sparkling green the pine trees that covered much of the Ponderosa's land.  
  
Joe didn't recognize the man, but in the back of his mind an alarm went off and told him to use extreme caution. Yet, before he could say anything, the man continued in a very cheerful voice, with a large grin on his face, "It is you, isn't it, Little Joe! Its been eleven years, whoo-wee! You've changed."  
  
Joe stared at him slightly confused, "Do-should I know you?" He hadn't meant to sound as rude as he had, but that anxious feeling was getting worse, and he was completely at a loss as to who this stranger was.  
  
"I worked on the Ponderosa ten, eleven years ago. My gosh! You look like a fine and dandy young man!"  
  
Joe smiled, glad that someone took notice that he was no longer a boy. The anxious feeling started to fall to the back of his mind. "Sorry, I don't seem to remember you. What's your name?"  
  
"Thomson, James Thomson." James smiled. "I'm sure your father remembers me."  
  
Joe nodded, "Yeah, he has a good memory."  
  
"So he's alright? Still alive, I mean? He should be getting up there in years. I haven't been in contact, I've been busy. How's that old man?"  
  
"Doing great, actually. Still got a lot a years ahead of 'im."  
  
James' grin grew wider, "Good to hear. You tell him I'm in town, okay?"  
  
"I'll do that," Joe answered.  
  
"See you around, Joe," James tipped his hat and walked away.  
  
Joe started again for the saloon; he didn't remember a James Thomson ever working at the ranch. But then again, hands came and went continuously. It was rather difficult to remember every one. He shook the thought from his mind, right now, all he wanted was a nice beer.  
  
*** After his brothers met Joe in the saloon, they didn't stay long. They reached their home just as Hop Sing was setting dinner on the table.  
  
"There you three are," Ben said jokingly, "I was beginning to think you weren't hungry."  
  
"Sucks, pa," Hoss answered, setting his hat down, "how could you ever think that?"  
  
The family laughed and sat down to an uneventful supper.  
  
After the meal was finished, the four Cartwrights sat in the living room drinking coffee. Joe and Hoss were engrossed in a game of checkers, while they chatted about the day's events.  
  
Suddenly, Joe remembered James. "Oh, pa, one of our old hands is in Virginia City and wanted me to tell you."  
  
"Really," Ben smiled, "who?"  
  
"He said he worked here about ten, eleven years ago; said his name was James Thomson."  
  
Ben nearly spit out the sip of coffee he had just taken; both Adam and Hoss froze, and Joe swore that he heard a dish crash and shatter on the floor in the kitchen. Ben stared at Joe almost fearfully, "You...are you alright son?"  
  
"He didn't hurt ya none, did 'e, Joe?" Hoss rushed.  
  
"Why didn't you tell us earlier?" Adams asked just as quickly.  
  
All three were talking over each other that Joe couldn't understand a single one of them, "Hold it! Hold it!" Joe yelled over the three of them. When they fell silent he continued. "I'd never heard of him before! He asked me to tell pa he was in town, that's all!"  
  
"Wad'da ya mean, Little Joe? You don' remember?" Hoss asked skeptically.  
  
"Remember what?"  
  
"You have to remember, Joe," Adam continued, "he-"  
  
"That's enough!" Ben said deathly quiet.  
  
"Why?" Joe asked, not willing to end the conversation with so many questions in his mind. "What happened?"  
  
"We have to get an early start tomorrow, why don't you go to bed?" Ben said, obviously avoiding the question.  
  
Joe looked slightly hurt, and did not want to leave unanswered, but the look in his father's eyes told him that he better not dare to argue. Joe had never seen that look in those eyes before. It was something even beyond fear. Joe had seen fear before, whenever he was sick or hurt, Ben worried far too much for his own good. Joe just guessed that Ben had been through so much emotional pain that anything could cause that same fear of losing another loved one to resurface. But why now? Just because a hand had returned to the city? And was that guilt mixed in with the fear?! "Sure, pa." He walked over to the staircase, he put his foot on the first step then turned around, "'Night pa, Adam, Hoss." They returned his sentiment and he ascended the stairs. He was about to enter his room when he heard his family resume his conversation.  
  
"Why d'ya think Joe cain't remember, pa?" Hoss asked, "Shouldn't he remember?"  
  
"I've heard that people block out memories that are too tramatic," Adam answered, "maybe that's what he's doing? He was only seven."  
  
"I don't care why he can't remember," Ben said, his voice raw with emotion, "I thank God for making him forget!"  
  
"Pa," Adam continued, "if Thomson is back he'll try to kill Little Joe again. He promised he'd be back."  
  
"Didn't we get word eight years ago that he had died?!" Ben asked with a sigh.  
  
"I thought we had!" Adam answered with a matching sigh.  
  
"What should we do, pa?" Hoss asked, "If Thomson sees Little Joe again he'll kill 'im."  
  
"No," Ben said solemnly, "He won't kill Joe unless I'm there to see it. You remember?"  
  
Joe couldn't believe what he was hearing. He desperately tried to remember what happened; unfortunately, nothing came to him. Why couldn't he remember? It couldn't have been too bad; he was still there wasn't he?  
  
"We have to keep Joe out of Virginia City," Ben continued. "I don't care how, just make sure he isn't ever alone."  
  
"What if he asks, pa?" Hoss asked, "What do we tell 'im happened?"  
  
Ben sighed again, "I don't know."  
  
"He needs to know, pa!" Adam shot, "We can't keep it a secret fo-"  
  
"No!" Ben yelled.  
  
"I think Joe has the right to know that he was nearly killed! At least if we tell him he might be careful."  
  
"No!" Ben repeated, "Adam you were there! You saw what they did to him! I-" His voice started to crack, "I didn't do anything!"  
  
"Dagburnit, pa! You couldn'ta done anything! I was there, too, remember? There were six of them, and they had guns, we didn't have anything."  
  
"I couldn't protect my own sons! Joe was a baby! I didn't stop them from beating or shooting my own seven year old son!"  
  
Joe was in a daze. He leaned against the wall and slid into a sitting position, and hugged his knees to his chest. That didn't make sense! It couldn't be true! He should definitely remember something about that!  
  
"It wasn't your fault, pa." Adam said comfortingly.  
  
"Yes, it was son." Everything fell silent for a moment, and then their father continued, "He was so little. Every time I see him hurt, that memory comes out. I see him bleeding; I can feel him lying in my arms, his blood covering my hands! I can hear him telling me..." he paused as he fought back the memory and the urge to cry, "I hear him telling me that it was his fault. That he was sorry he had caused it to happen!"  
  
"Thomson made him think that, pa," Adam said softly, "he tricked Little Joe into believing that."  
  
"Yeah, pa," Hoss added, "he was trying to protect us."  
  
"No," Ben said even softer, "Joe was trying to protect me. Thomson only threatened me."  
  
The misery in his father's voice broke Joe's heart. He was fine! His father shouldn't feel so guilty!  
  
"Joe's fine, pa." Hoss said, "We'll keep him away from the city."  
  
"I don't want him alone. Thomson will do anything to try to get to him. Now, both of you, up to bed, we have to be up early tomorrow."  
  
Joe scrambled to his room as silently as he could. He had a lot to think about.  
  
A/N: Well, I hope everyone likes the first chapter! Please send any reviews! I would gladly appreciate any! Don't be too harsh, if possible...I'm bearly into the storyline, and I haven't seen ALL the episodes of Bonanza. I'm just a Joe crazy fan! Night peeps. 


	2. Ben's Nightmare

Forgotten Past  
  
By Miranda Rochelle Inc  
  
Chapter 2: Ben's Nightmare  
  
Ben Cartwright had been searching for his seven year old, youngest son, for hours. His middle son looked up at him with fearful eyes, "We'll find 'im, won't we, pa?"  
  
Ben dismounted his faithful tireless horse and put his arms around the thirteen year old, "Don't worry, son." He sounded as if he was trying to convince himself more than the boy, "We'll find him."  
  
"Mr. Cartwright!" Charlie, one of the hands, called, "Mr. Cartwright! I found him!"  
  
Ben turned quickly to see Charlie riding into the yard, pulling Joe's horse along. Joe sat on his horse, tears streaking down his face. The boy took one look at his father and started to scream and tug the horse free. "No! I told you! I can't! I have to leave!" Joe looked straight into his father's eyes and started to cry harder. "Papa! Get out of here! Let me go!"  
  
Ben stared at his son, "Joe, what's wrong?"  
  
Joe shook his head and didn't answer. "No! Papa, you, Adam and Hoss need to leave!"  
  
Ben smiled slightly, relieved that his boy was now safe, even if he was hysterical. "Why do we need to leave Joe?"  
  
"'Cause he'll kill all of us!" Joe said frantically.  
  
Ben shook his head, "No, Joe, you're safe now, no one can hurt you." He walked closer to his son and noticed that he had a dark bruise on his cheek and a bit of dried blood under his nose and at the corner of his mouth. "Joe, who-what happened to you?"  
  
The faint click of a gun being cocked sounded and Ben turned to see one of his most trusted hands, and friend, pointing a revolver at his head. "I happened to him, Ben."  
  
"No!" Joe screamed again. And Hoss ran to his father's side.  
  
Ben instinctively pushed his middle son behind him, "James?"  
  
Thomson ignored him, "Joe?" He asked, not turning his eyes away from Ben, "What were you told, boy?"  
  
"No!" He yelled again, "I di'n't mean to! I tried! I didn't come back on purpose! They dragged me back!"  
  
"Todd," James called, "get the kid."  
  
Ben watched in horror as another one of his "trusted" hands walked over to his youngest son and grab him, "Leave my son alone!" He yelled and took a few steps toward him.  
  
Todd turned to his "boss" and Joe looked up at him, "Papa, don't!" He pleaded, which made Ben freeze in his tracks.  
  
Ben watched helplessly as Todd threw his son to the ground. He didn't care what his son wanted, he started to get even closer, but three more of his hands drew their guns on him.  
  
"Don't try, Cartwright!" One warned.  
  
"Than pick on a man, not a boy!"* Adam yelled.  
  
Adam Cartwright," James said with a smirk. He turned to face the eighteen year old who had his gun aimed right at his heart, "Always have to be first, eh, Adam?"  
  
Joe scrambled to his feet, "No! I didn't want to come back! I did what you told me! You can't hurt 'em! You can't hurt my family! You promised."  
  
James smirked, "You're here now, ain'tcha? You went back on your end of the deal. I told you what would happen." He walked up to Joe and aimed his gun at the boy, "Drop the gun, Adam." Adam stole a glace at his father, who nodded, then with a sigh, threw the gun to the ground near James. "Good; Jason, Tom, Andy, Hank, you know what to do." Two of the men grabbed Adam, one went to Ben to help Todd, and the last grabbed Hoss. Ben immediately began to struggle, James sent him a warning glance, "I have no qualms over killin' a seven year old, Ben, not after what you did to my son."  
  
Ben froze yet again, "Leave my son alone! I didn't do anything to your son! I didn't even know you had one!"  
  
"It doesn't matter! I know that it was your fault! And I'm gonna get my revenge!" He holstered his gun and balled his hand into a fist and swung it at Joe. It hit the boy squarely on the cheek and sent the boy crashing to the ground. James reached down and picked the boy up by his collar, he was breathing hard, trying his best not to cry from the pain. "Tell your papa how much it hurts." When Joe didn't answer, James grunted and threw the boy to the ground again, it earned him a slight whimper, but that was all.  
  
Ben tried desperately to fight off the two men holding him with little success. "Leave Joe alone! He's just a boy! If you want vengeance, take it out on me! Leave him alone!"  
  
James shook his head and mounted the horse Joe had been riding. "Stand up boy!" He spat at the little boy. Joe made no move to stand; he turned his head to look into Ben's eyes. The boy's eyes were filled with unshed tears. "Well?!"  
  
It broke Ben's heart to see the boy in obvious pain; he cursed himself for being to weak to help his sons. He was supposed to be strong! He had promised each one of his wives that he would protect them. He couldn't fail! Not now!  
  
Joe's eyes remained locked on his father's; it was painfully obvious that he felt as helpless as Ben.  
  
"Fine, boy." James said, drawing his gun, he aimed it right at Ben. "You knew what would happen."  
  
Joe scrambled to his feet, screaming "no" at the top of his lungs. Ben closed his eyes and took a deep breath, awaiting the pain of the shot. He jumped when he heard the shot, but was even more surprised that he didn't feel any pain. He heard his sons screaming and slowly opened his eyes. His heart stopped at the sight before him, just as if the bullet had gone straight through. Joe was lying face down on the ground, his limbs out at odd angles, with blood started to seep into his shirt from the bullet wound in his back. The men holding him seemed just as shocked, so Ben was able to pull away and fall to his knees at his youngest son's body. His mind barely registered the sound of James' horse riding away, as he carefully pulled his son into his arms.  
  
"Joe," he asked huskily, "Joseph, speak to me!" Tears gathered in his eyes, "Joe!"  
  
"P-papa-?" Joe chocked out. "I-are you...okay?"  
  
Ben hushed his son, "I'm fine, Joe," he answered, his voice breaking. "You're going to be alright son. Its alright." He looked up slightly, never fully taking his eyes off of his baby, "Adam, go get Doc Martin!"  
  
"Pa!" Adam argued, "We can't let him get away! I wo-"  
  
"Then tell Roy to go after him!" Ben snapped, cradling Joe closer, "I will not give him the satisfaction of killing any of my sons! Roy will go after him! Now go!"  
  
"Yessir!" Adam yelled, angrily wiping the tears out of his eyes. "You fight till I get back, Joe!" He ran to complete his orders.  
  
"Pa," Joe whimpered, "I'm cold." He started to sob, "It hurts, papa."  
  
Ben's tears slid down his face, "I know, Joe, I know. Just keep fighting, for me, Joe." He cautiously stood, being as gentile as possible. "For me." He looked over his shoulder, frightened to look away from Joe, "Hoss, get me some blankets."  
  
The thirteen year old looked frozen in shock. "Hoss! I need those blankets now!"  
  
Hoss nearly jumped out of his skin, started crying and nodded quickly at his father, then ran inside.  
  
Joe started trembling in his arms, "Its alright, Joe, its alright."  
  
"I-" Joe tried to force out the words. "'m s'ry, p'pa. I's ma flt. 'm s'ry."  
  
Ben couldn't believe what the boy was saying, "No! No, it isn't your fault, Joe. Joe!" The boy fell limp in his father's arms. Ben couldn't remember how to breathe, as he thought the Lord had taken his youngest son away from him, but the poor child's raspy, shallow, breaths brought him out of that shock. He carefully walked to the settee as Hoss started to lay blankets down. He set his youngest son on them and covered him with two more. He pulled them down slightly ripped the neckerchief from it's place and held it firmly to the wound.  
  
Joe whimpered again and made a very weak and vain attempt to move away from the pressure. "P'pa, don le'v m...e."  
  
Ben took his son's small hand in his, "I won't, Joe. I'm right here." Tears fell unchecked from his eyes.  
  
***  
  
Ben sat up quickly in his bed. He was trembling; he pinched the bridge of his nose. It had been years since he had had that nightmare. He wiped away the tears that were trailing down his face. He had a terrible feeling that this time, James would make sure that Joe died in Ben's arms.  
  
A/N: Howdees! Wow! Another chapter done. I hope you all like it. Sam especially! Love you! :-* You know that I'll always be your fangirl! And a special thanx to Horisont! My first reviewer! I took a peek at your page...I think I'll read some of your stories, I love Gundam. And I thank Jade as well, my second reviewer! I'm glad that I'm not the only one who likes 60's T.V. ::CoughStarTrekROCKScough:: It's cool to know that I'm not the only Bonanza fan out there. Michael Landon is sooooo hot! ::Swoon:: Today's episode was sad though...it was about Ben and Inger's travel west, poor Ben. The Cartwright "kiss of death" strikes again. Though I think I could deal if I could kiss little Joe. There are some other great Bonanza fics out there, ones that I liked.  
  
Hold up...I just thought of something...Jade....and Horisont...you're both reviewers to my anime stories...well, hey! Who knows? Maybe I can get all of you anime peeps into 1960's American T.V.?! (And if you already like Bonanza, even better!) Well, night! Next chapter will be up next weekend! (There are strict rules about me NOT going online on weekdays) 


	3. Uneasy Morning

Forgotten Past  
  
By Miranda Rochelle Inc  
  
Chapter 3: Uneasy Morning  
  
Morning dawned uneasily on the Ponderosa. Ben had been the first to wake, but couldn't get back to sleep after his nightmare. He had gotten dressed and went downstairs to dwell on it over a cup (or even a pot) of coffee, on the settee, in front of the fireplace. Joe's well-being weighed heavily on his mind. He sipped his coffee and sighed heavily, staring into the flickering flames. He had come so close to loosing his youngest that night, it left a terrible foreboding feeling that had never entirely left him; which was most likely the reason he had always been so overprotective of the boy.  
  
Adam walked down the stairs, "Pa? What are you doing up so early?" He was fully dressed as well, and looked almost as sleep-deprived as his father. Though Adam did well to cover it up, Ben could always tell when his sons were hurting.  
  
Ben looked up, slightly startled, then smiled thoughtfully, "Couldn't sleep, you?" He already knew the answer. Adam had always been the most responsible of his sons; and he had always tried to take care of his both of his younger brothers. Joe must be the first thing on the younger man's mind.  
  
"Me either. You keep thinking about Joe?"  
  
Ben sighed, "That's the problem, all I can think about is cradling him in my arms." He shook his head to push the memories into the back of his mind. "He's not a boy anymore. I know that, for the most part he can take care of himself-" he stopped and sighed, not knowing how to complete his sentence. "There have been very few times in my life that I have felt helpless, and I do not enjoy it." Ben knew that Adam understood what he meant; his oldest son had been there with him when two of his wives had died, not to mention on numerous occasions when any of his sons were sick or hurt. Adam knew that that one night had nearly killed their father. He had lost three wives; all he had were his ranch and his three boys.  
  
His heart couldn't take another loss.  
  
"We all feel the same way, pa. But Joe's safe now. And I think that Thomson wants us to feel the stress more than anything. Otherwise he would have taken Joe when he saw him in town."  
  
Ben sighed again, digesting Adam's words, "I'm bound and determined not to let him get to me." He looked into his son's eyes, "Though it doesn't seem to be working."  
  
Adam sat down in the blue chair next to the settee, "I don't think it's working for any of us."  
  
"I know it ain't workin' fir me," Hoss said, descending the stairs. He looked just the same as the older Cartwrights, fully dressed, but clearly tiered.  
  
"I know, son," Ben answered. Hoss had always been the most apathetic Cartwright. Sometimes Ben believed that his middle son cared about everything far too much for his own good. Though, Hoss was also very close to his younger brother, which right now seemed to even further complicate things.  
  
Adam's head suddenly snapped up, "Pa? Did you hear that?"  
  
Ben and Hoss immediately snapped to alert, listening carefully. Hooves pounded like thunder on the ground outside their home. They jumped up and grabbed their guns, ready for a fight, there had to be at least four horses! Ben listened again before his eyes widened fearfully. "They're leaving!" He yelled as he ran to the staircase, praying that the only other Cartwright was still safe. Adam and Hoss followed closely behind.  
  
A/N: Sorry about the cliffy...if I'm feeling generous, I might put up another chapter tomorrow. Sigh, I had such a hard time thinking up a title for this chapter. If you have a better one, I'm all for it. I'm sorry I didn't update last night, I had forgotten that it was one of those "Show Amanda how pathetically low she is in the social hierarchy of high school" nights. (a.k.a.: Winter Formal) But that's ok! My friends and I had a great time! We didn't vote for the stupid "populars" running for court, and went into another room when they were crowned! Haha! The losers "win" again!  
  
Anywho, I wanted to thank all of my wonderful reviewers! Sam, a.k.a. Spoils the Viking, as always, luv u much! Julie/Shampoo (heehee Ranma) it's spiffy to see another anime chick who loves Bonanza! Carly, thanks a lot! And Linda, who I forgot to thank for the last chapter. Oh! We have to get all the Bonanza fans under 20 together so Sam can feel good, he doesn't think there are any! He feels lonely. Even though he shouldn't, cause he had Valkerie and me.  
  
And of course I have to TOTALLY send my love to JULES47! All the way from Australia. Wow...that's far away. Though it probably isn't for you...hmm. I'm glad that you like it. It makes me feel really good. Especially after all the flames I got for my last story...sheesh! I thank you, with all my heart, and think that it is awesome you are such a fan. I guess I feel a lot luckier to have three eps a day! I haven't seen 300 eps though! Wow.  
  
I think that is long enough for an author's not, don't you? Well, I would say "night" but I'm so doped up on cold medicine, I'm not going to sleep for a while yet. So adi! (short for "adios")  
  
Sincerely,  
  
Amanda L.'s evil clone "Miranda Inc"  
  
P.S. ::Sigh:: I just noticed how many spelling errors there are...sheesh, no wonder my computer hates me. I make it work so hard! 


	4. Rude Awakening

Forgotten Past  
  
By Miranda Rochelle Inc  
  
Chapter 4: Rude Awakening  
  
A slight thud resounded through the bedroom of Joseph Cartwright, waking the young man from his restless sleep. He groaned, but didn't open his eyes. "Adam? Hoss?" He called quietly, "Go away, I just went to sleep." He had spent most of the night thinking about what his family had said; and trying to remember any part of that night. He had hopped that his family might leave him be for a while because of it! Neither of his brothers answered, so Joe, his mind still hazy from sleep, went to the only other logical conclusion he could think: "Pa, I'm fine. I'm just tired. I'll b- "  
  
A hand clamped tightly over his mouth, "Quiet, boy!" A man whispered so close to Joe's ear; he could feel the man's hot breath against his skin.  
  
Joe's eyes snapped open as he struggled to free himself. The struggle was in vain as a hard blow was dealt to his stomach. He doubled over on his bed, his arms wrapping themselves tightly around his injured midsection. "P-a," he gasped for enough breath to call for his family who where only down the hall.  
  
"Keep him quiet!" The man hissed, barely above the whisper he had used to speak to Joe.  
  
Another fist drove deeply into Joe's midsection, the young man gasped for breath, but could not fill his lungs. Joe doubled over again, and tried to open his eyes. It was too dark to see much; all he could tell was that his window was open and there where three dark shadows in front of him. A fourth was behind him, ruthlessly grasping his hair.  
  
The man pulled Joe up into a standing position next to his bed, and held onto him tightly. "I should hang you right here, boy!" He whispered maliciously. "Lynch you, just like your pa did to my son!"  
  
Joe shook his head, "No," he whispered, "my pa wouldn-"  
  
A shadow hit him in the stomach again.  
  
"If you wake," the man continued, "tell Ben there are no more warnings. I'll see him cry over your grave; even if I hang for it."  
  
Joe looked up weakly, his room was too dark to see the man's exact features, but the man's eyes were perfectly clear. They were horrible, shining eyes that almost glowed.  
  
Suddenly, he felt a tremendous pain as something struck the back of his head; and his entire world went black.  
  
A/N: Yay, another chapter! I know, I know! It's really short. But you people should feel lucky I even updated this weekend anyway! I've spent 90% of the last 72 hours sleeping! Jeebus! If I had known it would hurt this much to have 4 stupid teeth taken out, I would have said to leave the stupid wisdom teeth in! Let it mess up my nice, straight, braces-fixed teeth! Owww...  
  
And codeine...whoa! Drugs are BAD! I haven't taken the stuff in over 28 hours and I still feel out of it...  
  
Moral of the story: Dentists are evil. You need your teeth. Don't let dentists take your teeth. Or take them out and give them to you.  
  
(Wisdom teeth are huge...heehee, they gave them to me.)  
  
As you can see, I'm still out of it. I hope to be well enough to update later. I hope!  
  
Later peeps. 


	5. Safe and Sound

Forgotten Past  
  
By Miranda Rochelle Inc  
  
Chapter 5: Safe and Sound  
  
Ben vaulted up the stairs to his son's room, faster than a prized racehorse could have. He didn't bother to knock on the door, he simply threw it open; but couldn't step beyond the threshold. There, just next to the bed, in a heap on the floor, was his youngest son.  
  
Adam and Hoss rushed up behind their father. Adam took one look and started to push past his father as he whispered his youngest brother's name, but Ben held his arm out, almost absentmindedly.  
  
Ben couldn't bring himself to say it, but in his mind, he cried out to his oldest. 'Joe is my son, Adam shouldn't have to—' the thought was bad enough, he couldn't let himself complete it. Ben stumbled over to his son's body and carefully smoothed the boy's unruly curls from his forehead. His hair was exactly like Marie's. 'Please,' Ben prayed silently as tears gathered in his eyes, 'don't take him yet. You took away my wives, but please, don't take my son.' He gently slid his arm under his son's neck to lift him onto the bed, when Joe moaned weakly.  
  
Ben couldn't believe his ears. He pulled Joe close and almost laughed out of relief. "Adam! Get doc Martin! Joe, its alright. I'm here, Joe."  
  
"Pa," Joe whimpered, "he wanted to lynch me, pa."  
  
Ben tried to sooth the boy, "It's alright, son, they're gone. "Hoss, light the lamp for me."  
  
"Yessir." Hoss answered and the room filled with a soft yellow glow.  
  
Ben could instantly see the bruises on his son's face, which caused a pang of guilt in his heart. He had been just down the hall, but he hadn't heard his son cry for help.  
  
"Pa, stop Adam, I don't need a doctor." He groaned, "What happened, pa?" He looked straight into his father's eyes, "Why does Thomson hate me so much?"  
  
Ben tried futilely to swallow the lump in his throat, "Don't think about that, Joe. I just want the doctor to make sure you don't have a concussion, or anything else serious."  
  
Joe tried to push his father away, "He said you lynched his son! I tried to tell him you didn't, but he wouldn't listen to me, pa! He said you lynched him!"  
  
"Joseph, I have never lynched anyone in my life. Hoss, help me get your brother into bed."  
  
Hoss swallowed, and went to grab Joe's arm, but Joe dodged it. "Pa! Then why does he want to kill me?! Why cant you tell me what happened?!" He turned to his older brother, "Why don't you tell me, huh?! I heard the three of you talking; I know you were there! Someone needs to tell me what happened!"  
  
Ben clenched his fists and closed his eyes. Deathly quiet he answered, "Joseph, that's enough. Get back into bed, and wait for the doctor."  
  
"I'm fine, pa. I don't need Doc Martin. Pa, you know I hate doctors, I'm not really hurt, so go tell Adam to stop."  
  
Those words stung his heart, Joe had never been afraid of doctors before that night.........  
  
Joe sighed and allowed his family to help him onto his bed. "Hoss," Joe asked, "could I talk to pa.........alone?"  
  
Hoss looked at their father then nodded, "Sure, short shanks." He turned to Ben, "I should get started with the chores, anyhow." Then he walked out of the room.  
  
Ben pulled a chair over to Joe's bedside and sat, Joe looked horrible to him. His left eye was almost completely closed it was so badly bruised. He right cheek wasn't much better, and Ben was sure there were more bruises, but all he could see at the moment was his son's face. "What is it you wanted to talk to me about, son?"  
  
Joe sighed again, "I don't remember what happened, pa. I heard you, Adam, and Hoss talking, but none of it made any sense! Do you know how frustrating it is? The three of you are so worried, but I can't be afraid of something I don't understand. You told them to make sure I wasn't ever alone. I understand that after what just happened, but I don't know why any of this is happening, pa! I can't remember!"  
  
"Don't try, Joseph. Please, you don't need to."  
  
Joe grimaced and put his hand over his stomach. "They ambushed me, pa, in my own room." He gingerly touched his face, "And they didn't stop after they knocked me out."  
  
Ben sighed, "Did he say anything to you, besides wanting to lynch you?"  
  
Joe looked straight into his father's eyes, "He said.........he wanted me to tell you........." He paused.  
  
Ben steeled himself, "What did he tell you, son?"  
  
Ben breathed deeply and nodded, "Stay in bed, son; I want Doc Martin to make sure you're alright."  
  
Joe had sense enough not to argue, for an astonishing two times in twenty- four hours.  
  
***  
  
Dr. Paul Martin came and went, saying that Joe might be sore for a while, but all that was wrong were a few bruises and a lump on the head. Joe could have sworn that his head hurt enough to have at least a mild concussion, but he wasn't going to tell the good doctor that.  
  
Joe was starting to get very worried about his father. He was acting very out of character. Ben Cartwright was strong, physically and emotionally; so why couldn't he look his youngest son in the eye? Why wouldn't he tell him anything?!  
  
This was not Benjamin Cartwright, owner of the Ponderosa!  
  
Ben Cartwright didn't cry; the deaths of three wives saw to that. Joe hadn't thought anything, short of the death of him or his brothers, could bring such a strong man to tears. But that was the second time he had seen tears fall from those steely chocolate eyes in only a few hours time.  
  
Joe realized that he wasn't going to get any information out of his father. Maybe he could get something out of Adam or Hoss?  
  
A/N: ::Ducks all things being thrown at her:: I'm sorry! I've been mondo busy. My mom also has lots of reports to do for her PhD, so I can't use the pc. I'm sorry! I'll put up more chapters next weekend, if I can, and I'll try to make them longer. The thing is, I only type what I can write during class during the week, which as you can see, isn't much. I'm more or less making this up week by week. I have virtually no clue how this will turn out. I know only a little more then you people do! Like *I* know exactly what happened after that night.........my own imagination frightens me sometimes. It will come up eventually.........maybe as another dream, but from Adam or Hoss.........I don't know. But all will eventually be explained.  
  
Lisa G: sorry, apathetic, sympathetic.........I think I was thinking empathic.........I don't know. Thanx, I'll try to fix it really soon! Always good to know where my mistakes are. At least I'm not confusing then and than anymore. My sci-fi teacher made me write the definitions for those 25x each cause I messed them up so many times.........  
  
Jade: Thanx for the review. So many people have the same names online.........I get confused. I'm very easily confused.  
  
Jules47: Thanx for the review, I live to entertain! And thank you for the feeling better vibes, they helped!  
  
And lastly, to Carly, Biene, Phuong Bui, Wanda, Simon, Karen, Rhonda, Horisont, and of course, Sam ::a.k.a. Todd Smith:: Thankies and much love! Keep reviewing! 


	6. StandOff

Forgotten Past  
  
Chapter 6:  
  
By: Miranda Rochelle Inc  
  
Ben walked out of the house and stood on the porch. He needed to think. As much as he disliked admitting it, he was desperately afraid for his youngest son. Thomson was toying with them. He had proven that he could get to Joe whenever or wherever he wanted; he could even kill Joe while Ben sat obliviously in the next room.  
  
That was a most terrifying thought. He whispered a soft prayer for God to protect his youngest. It was a fairly well known fact that he was extra protective of Little Joe; just a consequence of being the youngest. No matter how old Joe got, he was still Ben's baby boy, and always would be.  
  
A slight movement in the corner of his eye caught his attention. He quickly turned to see the cause. His hand instantly went to his hip and drew his gun. His blood started to boil at Thomson's audacity.  
  
"How dare you stand there? I should kill you where you stand," Ben spat.  
  
Thomson gave been a sadistic smirk and leaned back against the barn. "Hello, Ben." His voice was smooth and even; his calm attitude only fed Ben's anger. He even had the gal to tip his new looking black hat in mock- politeness. "How are you this morning? It sure has been a while, hasn't it?" His smirk widened into a full-toothed grin, "How's those boys of yours? That youngest should be a grown man by now, right?"  
  
Ben tried to quell his anger, he needed to keep a level head. It was taking everything he has to not empty the barrel of his gun into his son's tormentor. "Be quiet," Ben snapped in clipped tones, "I'm taking you to the sheriff's office in Virginia City. Mark my words, I'll see you hang."  
  
Thomson started to laugh, "It's been eleven years, Ben! What can you arrest me for?"  
  
Ben took a deep breath. His heart was screaming at him to kill the monster right where he stood, because there was nothing that the law could do until something happened to one of his sons; but his mind forced him to go against his heart's most dire wish. He took another deep breath, trying not to show this bastard his emotion. "Breaking into my home, beating my son, I'm sure I can find enough."  
  
"I doubt those are hanging offences, Ben." Thomson shook his head and he pushed off of the barn and walked closer to Ben, "Such determination, Ben. You've changed. You use to have such heart, such kindness.........what happened?"  
  
Ben gritted his teeth, "Stop, Thomson. Just come quietly—"  
  
Ben was startled by the front door slamming closed, "Hey, pa," Joe called, "Hop Sing—"  
  
"Joe Thomson smiled, his evergreen eyes suddenly no longer looking at Ben, "your father and I were just talking about you."  
  
"Get out of here, Joe!" Ben called, without looking away from his target. Knots started to form in his stomach, had Thomson set them up?! Was there a man, just out of sight, waiting to fire the deadly bullet that would end Joe's life?! Ben could feel that his son had not listened to him and added quickly, "I said, get into the house, young man!"  
  
Thomson's eyes found there way back to Ben's, "Come now, Ben, if the boy would like—"  
  
"Quite! You're coming with me."  
  
A shot rang out and as soon as Ben realized that he wasn't hit, he whipped around to Joe. His son had his gun drawn and was looking around for where the shot had originated.  
  
Adam and Hoss came carefully running out of the door, hurriedly asking what the shot was.  
  
Ben didn't answer, he turned back to the barn, but Thomson was already gone. He sighed exasperatingly. "He's gone, again!"  
  
Adam and Hoss looked at each other for a moment slightly confused, before they realized that there could be no other "he" than Thomson.  
  
A/N: Another chapter. Hazzah. I know that in the last chapter I left a few things, like why Joe is afraid of doctors kinda open, but it will eventually be explained. I just haven't been able to work it into the chapters yet. I was reading a fic that was talking about Joe not liking doctors, and this little idea hit me. It connects with the whole, when things happen when you're a kid, it sticks.........which seems to be intertwined into this story.........I don't know, I'm just randomly coming up with things to keep myself entertained, I'm sorry. But if you have any questions, please e-mail me, either Amanda or Miranda will answer, depending which mood I'm in. Miranda prefers to answer.........cause evil clones are like that. Glory hogs.  
  
Spoiler for the next chapter: All the waiting is over. Thomson is sick of waiting to get his revenge. Ben Cartwright's misery will finally begin.  
  
Oh! Does anyone know where I can get the Bonanza theme ring tone for my phone? I spent four hours looking for it, but everyplace I went charges. I'm sorry, but I'm not going to pay four dollars to have my phone ring, ok. Well, the American sites charged. The ones for the UK and other places didn't! Americans are really greedy it seems.........how sad. Bowdees, peeps, keep those reviews coming. 


	7. Foolish Mistakes

Forgotten Past  
  
Chapter 7: Foolish Mistakes  
  
By Miranda Rochelle Inc  
  
The next few days passed without incident; unfortunately, it only caused the members of the Cartwright family to become more paranoid with each passing second. Joe was already annoyed at having someone constantly hovering over his shoulder; his infinitely short temper had everyone on edge. Joe was ready to find any way to ditch his shadows and go into town for a nice relaxing beer. His father had explicitly stated that he was to go nowhere alone, and by no mean go anywhere near Virginia City.  
  
Unfortunately, Joe wasn't in the mood to listen to his father's over- protectiveness. He had decided to sneak off this night, just to give his nerves a rest. The Ponderosa's atmosphere was so tense; he felt that it was about to crush him. He had tried to squeeze information out of his brothers about what happened that fateful night, but they wouldn't answer him.  
  
His family had gone to sleep early, so this was the perfect time for his escape. Joe quickly got dressed, carefully opened his window and crept onto the roof. He almost fell while walking across, but was able to get down safely. In a flash, he had Cochise saddled and was leading her quietly away from the house. When he believed he was far enough away, he jumped onto her back and smiled. He felt like the world had finally been lifted off of his shoulders. One beet and maybe a game of poker; that was all he would need to make him perfect again.  
  
He was just out of the city's limits and feeling exceedingly carefree, when three riders came up and surrounded him. It was difficult to see their exact features, but they obviously didn't want to buy him a beer.  
  
"Joe Cartwright?" The one directly in front of him asked.  
  
"No," Joe answered without missing a beat. "Name's Sam Jennings."  
  
"Well, Mr. Jennings," the man on his right asked, heavily accenting "Mr.", "what is your business in Virginia City?"  
  
"Just wanted a beer," Joe answered truthfully. "There something wrong?"  
  
"Yes," the man in front of him answered, drawing his gun, "we were told to escort you elsewhere."  
  
Joe swallowed nervously, maybe ditching the protective shadows wasn't such a good idea. "I thought you said you were after this Joe Cartwright."  
  
"So you've changed your name in the past few days," the one on his left piped up, "You're coming with us."  
  
Joe looked around, trying to find any way to escape; but none appeared to be possible. Two more riders approached, one lead a unridden horse.  
  
"Take him down," the rider who wasn't leading the extra horse stated blandly. "And don't forget to give me the jacket.  
  
Joe's heart sank immediately. Thomson had been waiting for him to do something this stupid. Two men pulled him roughly from his horse and tore his favorite green jacket off of him. Before he could protest, he was thrust onto the saddle of the extra horse, his wrists bound together to the saddle horn and a gag tied tightly around his mouth.  
  
"Take him to the mountains, I want to see Ben sweat first," Thomson spat.  
  
The horse Joe was on was quickly led away at a brisk pace. All the while, he cursed his own stupid impetuousness. Why had he been so careless? His entire family had repeatedly warned him that Thomson was dangerous! Why, for once, couldn't he have just listened to them?! 'Please," he thought, 'I'm sorry, pa. I'm so sorry.'  
  
* * *  
  
Adam Cartwright might only be nineteen, but his father had always trusted him to be a mature adult and take care of his younger brothers, no matter what situation arose. He had done exactly that since he was only six years old. So why had he just stood there?!  
  
He angrily wiped the tears out of his eyes. He hadn't done anything. He just stood there. Joe was now dying, slowly, painfully, in his room, because Adam hadn't done anything to stop Thomson.  
  
Dr. Martin had rushed to the house as quickly as humanly possible, but Joe was so little. Adam had seen many grown men die after being shot, grown men! Joe was just a child.  
  
Just a little child.........  
  
Hoss sobbed loudly, knocking Adam out of his thoughts. "Joe's gonna die." His icy-blue eyes bored into Adam, "There's nothin' Doc Martin can do, is there, Adam? Joe's gonna die."  
  
Adam wrapped his arms around his younger brother, "Be strong, Hoss." How could he console the teen if he was thinking the exact same thing? "Doc Martin will do everything he can, you know that."  
  
"Doc Martin will do all he can to help Joe," Roy Coffee, the town sheriff had been informed of the violence at the ranch and rushed over to see what he could do. This family was close enough to be his own; he would see that the man responsible for hurting such a little child, hang.  
  
Hoss just cried harder.  
  
A piercing scream echoed through the house. Adam, Hoss and Roy's attention snapped to the closed door of their little brother's room. Hoss pulled away, looking ready to kill whomever it was that caused their little brother to scream in such pain.  
  
Adam grabbed Hoss before he could launch himself up the stairs, "The doc has to take the bullet out, Hoss. It hurts, but it will be over soon."  
  
Hoss again looked into his brother's eyes, he had always trusted Adam to know everything. "He's hurtin' 'im, Adam. Make 'im stop. Please, Adam. Don't let 'im hurt Little Joe no more."  
  
Adam nodded slightly and let go of his younger brother, "Don't worry, Hoss." But the statement meant nothing. "Stay here," he walked up the stairs and opened the door to Joe's room slightly. Ben was holding the semi-conscious, crying boy, tears staining his own cheeks, as Dr. Martin tried to remove the bullet from Joe's back.  
  
The little boy was pale and trying weakly to get away from what was causing him pain. Ben's jaw was set tightly as he tried to hold the boy still so the doctor could work.  
  
"P-a," Joe cried, barely above a whisper, "I-t hur-s. St-p 'm, p-pa. Don let m hur me n'more."  
  
"It's alright, Joe," Ben tried to assure the himself more than his son, "it's almost over, son." Ben looked at his friend pleadingly, "Paul, he's just a boy! Can't you give him something?! ANYTHING?!"  
  
Dr. Martin was concentrating deeply on his task, "I've got it, Ben, just hold him still."  
  
Ben tightened his grip, "It's almost over, Joe, I'm here, son, it's alright."  
  
Slowly, but with skilled and practiced ease, the doctor pulled the bullet out and set it on the dresser. Joe fell completely limp in his father's arms, but it didn't stop Ben from trying to sooth him. He kept whispering that it was over, and that everything would be all right.  
  
Adam stood in the doorway, as if in a trance, while the skilled doctor did as much as he could for the small boy. Joe, gratefully, stayed unconscious through the rest. Paul Martin stood and put his hand on his friend's shoulder, "Ben, please, come with me for a moment."  
  
Ben shook his head slowly, "No, Paul, I have to stay with him. I don't want him to wake and be alone."  
  
"Ben, he........." the doctor swallowed, unsure how to tell his friend the facts. "Ben, Joe was badly hurt. He lost a lot of blood."  
  
"He's strong," Ben argued, "he'll be alright."  
  
Adam knew that his father was trying to believe that Joe would wake up in a few hours and be fine, but the man's voice betrayed what he knew to be the truth. They both understood what the doctor was trying to tell them.  
  
The nineteen-year-old felt tears start to fall from his eyes. He couldn't stop them. He had taken care of the boy since he was born. Little Joe couldn't die!  
  
"Pa?" Adam said weakly; but Ben was too busy holding Joe's hand and whispering prayers to pay attention. "Pa?" Adam repeated a little louder.  
  
Ben turned angrily to his oldest son, "What?!" He snapped.  
  
"Pa, I," Adam couldn't think of anything to say that would console his father.  
  
Ben took a few deep breaths, and turned back to Joe's sleeping face, knowing that Adam was trying. "Is Roy here yet?"  
  
Adam nodded, "Yes, pa, he's downstairs. He said that whenever you were ready, you could talk to him."  
  
"Could you send him up here." He bent over and kissed Joe's forehead, "I need to stay with Joe."  
  
Adam nodded, "Yes, pa."  
  
* * *  
  
Ben sat at the table, sipping his coffee. Another morning had dawned, and, though he still had that worry buried deep in his heart, he felt calm. Nothing had happened in days now, and aside from Joe getting on everyone nerves, his son was his normal self.  
  
"Hey, pa," Hoss called from the top of the stairs, "is Joe plannin' on goin' somewheres?"  
  
Ben stood and walked to the foot of the stairs, "Not that I know of Hoss, why?"  
  
Hoss looked confused, "Cochise is out in the yard, all saddled and ready."  
  
Panic started to build as he ran to the door and out to see Joe's prized horse standing in the yard. He carefully approached the animal, his heart hammering against his ribs. On the saddle, Joe's favorite green jacket was carefully tied. Ben pulled the jacket off the saddle, a scrap of paper fell to the ground. Ben fearfully picked it up, and looked at the five words scrawled, in neat, bold letters:  
  
"I told you, no warning."  
  
A/N: Well, another chapter. Hope you like it. Oh, someone told me about a part missing from chapter 5, Ben asked Joe what Thomson told him, this is how it really goes, (it helps this part make more sense)  
  
Ben sighed, "Did he say anything to you, besides wanting to lynch you?"  
  
Joe looked straight into his father's eyes, "He said.........he wanted me to tell you........." He paused.  
  
Ben steeled himself, "What did he tell you, son?"  
  
Joe looked as if he was having a hard time saying it, "He-he said that there wouldn't be a warning, pa. You wouldn't get a warning."  
  
Ben breathed deeply and nodded, "Stay in bed, son; I want Doc Martin to make sure you're alright."  
  
Joe had sense enough not to argue, for an astonishing two times in twenty- four hours.  
  
Hope that makes more sense! Enjoy. Till next weekend! 


	8. Gone

Forgotten Past  
  
Chapter 8: Gone  
  
Ben stared at the scrap of paper. For a long while, he couldn't believe his eyes. Those five words couldn't possibly mean what he thought they did. They couldn't.  
  
"Pa?" Hoss asked; he looked over his father's shoulder and read the note. He started to shake his head in disbelief. "No, pa..." he whispered. "He..."  
  
"Joe!" Ben called without even noticing that Hoss was there. "Joseph!" He repeated, more frantically. He rushed up the stairs, shouting for his youngest baby.  
  
Adam quickly opened the door of his room wondering what his youngest brother had done this time. He immediately forgot his frustration on being interrupted from his book when he saw his father nearly tear the door off of Little Joe's room. He ran after his father, and entered Joe's room just as Ben fell to his knees and start to sob.  
  
"My son..." he whispered. He slammed his fist on the hard wood floor. "No! How? Why, Lord? Why?!"  
  
Adam didn't need anymore information. But he was not about to give up. He feared that Joe was most likely already dead, but if there was even the slightest glimmer of hope that he could be found alive, he would have to be found soon. "Pa," Adam started, but his father wasn't listening. It wasn't like his father to give up so easily. "Pa!" He said louder.  
  
Ben took a deep breath, "Adam," it was obvious that he was forcing the words out, "get out."  
  
"Pa, if we go to Virginia City and get a posse together right now—"  
  
"Leave me alone, Adam." Ben whispered dangerously. He didn't need false hope. And by Thomson's note, it was final. He would never see his baby boy again.  
  
Adam lowered his head. This was not his father. Ben Cartwright would have at least tried. He stepped out of the room. If his father wouldn't do anything, he would have to. He would not give up, not until there was physical proof that Joe was dead. No matter how long it was, he would keep some miniscule amount of hope until his brother was found; alive...or dead.  
  
He walked down the stairs and saw Hoss sitting on the sette, in front of the fireplace, his head in his hands. "Hoss?"  
  
The large man looked up, his face red and tearstained. "He's...gone, Adam. Lil' Joe. Thomson...Thomson...killed..."  
  
Suddenly, Adam felt ice flow through his veins. Maybe there was proof? Little Joe's body? No, if his body had been found, their father would be holding it, not be in Joe's room crying. Though he no longer felt the same hope that he had just seconds ago. "Hoss...are you...?"  
  
"Little Joe's jacket was tied on Cochise...I found it in the yard. And there was a note...Thomson k...Joe's dead."  
  
Adam couldn't believe his family's attitude. It just didn't make sense. The Cartwrights just didn't give up like this! He felt the same way as his father and brother, but was he the only one who would have to keep some miniscule amount of hope alive? He was known for being the sensible one, but this was just too much. He couldn't keep all the hope when his entire family was against him.  
  
"Hoss, listen to me," he said rather bluntly, almost harshly, "we don't have a body. And until I see Little Joe dead, with my own eyes, I'm going to believe that we could still find him. But, if we are going to find him, we have to start looking. NOW!"  
  
His younger brother looked at him, his icy eyes conveying the same pain they had held eleven years ago. Adam instantly regretted being so rough with the emotional man.  
  
"I understand, Adam. But pa..."  
  
"He's just scared, Hoss. He lost three wives, he can't start loosing us. That's why we have to find Thomson before anything happens to Joe."  
  
Hoss nodded, "What d'we tell pa? He wouldn' let us go looking for Thomson before, d'ya think he's gonna let us now?"  
  
"Hoss, do you really think he's going to notice if we're gone right now?"  
  
Hoss eyes bored into the wall the hid the door of Joe's room, "No."  
  
"Then let's saddle the horses and ride into Virginia City. At the very least we have to tell Roy that Little Joe was kidnapped."  
  
Hoss nodded and wiped the last remaining tears from his eyes. "We gotta find him."  
  
Adam and Hoss rode into Virginia City, looking for Thomson, or anyone who had seen him. Hoss wanted to head straight for the saloon and begin the interrogations, but Adam said that they should see Roy before they did anything. It was quite obvious that Hoss still believed that Joe was dead, and nothing Adam could say would convince him otherwise. Hoss' motive for joining Adam was, pure and simple, revenge.  
  
Roy didn't believe what the Cartwrights were telling him. He had searched high and low for that monster just after Joe had been shot. He had notified the surrounding cities, sending out wanted posters, and had received word that he had been killed, not more than eight, nine years ago, in a shootout with a sheriff, just their side of the Nevada/California border.  
  
It didn't make sense. But, if Joseph was missing, he would find him. "I'll get a posse together," the sheriff said definitively. "Do you have any idea where we should start looking?"  
  
Adam took a deep breath, he didn't want to say what Roy needed to know. He felt that if he said it, it would come true. He wouldn't be able to stop it after it was spoken. "Thomson wants revenge on pa. He'll keep Joe close enough so that pa will have to watch Joe die." There, he said it. He took a another deep breath before he continued, "There are more places on the Ponderosa to hide than I can count. And that doesn't include the surrounding area. But, Hoss and I both know the Ponderosa. We can show you the places that Thomson might be able to hide Joe."  
  
Roy nodded. "Then let's get started, the sooner we start, the better the chance of finding Little Joe."  
  
A/N: Sorry! I know that it has been a LONG time since my last update, but I had a lot of things to deal with! I just graduated high school, and not only did I have to deal with all that stuff that went with that, but I had major writers block AND my dad had to have surgery. He'll be fine though. I promise to have the next chapter up before next weekend. Thanks for understanding!  
  
And so the search for Little Joe begins! Will they find him? And if they do, will he be alive...? 


	9. The Posse

Forgotten Past  
  
Chapter 9: The Posse  
  
Ben couldn't force himself to move. He just knelt there, at the foot of his youngest son's bed. What had been his youngest son's bed. How could he not have noticed it?! How was Thomson able to get Joe out of his room and away without him noticing?  
  
How did he get Cochise saddled and out of the barn without anyone noticing?  
  
Why had Ben himself not stopped him?  
  
He failed his son.  
  
And Joe had paid the ultimate price for his failure.  
  
Joe was so young. He didn't deserve to die. No one deserved to be murdered.  
  
Except for one person...  
  
'No!' He pushed that thought out of his head. As much as he wanted to kill Thomson with his bare hands, he had to let the law do it. Ben could afford an army of lawyers to make sure Thomson would hang.  
  
But he would do that later. Right now, he didn't think he could stand. He cried. He couldn't do anything else. He cried harder than he had for Elizabeth, harder than he cried for Inger, and even harder than he had cried for Marie.  
  
"I failed you, Marie. I'm so sorry. Marie, I couldn't care for him," he whispered, between sobs. "I'm sorry, Joe. I'm sorry."  
  
Adam smiled when he saw the posse that Sheriff Coffee had gathered. Joe had many friends, many of whom sat on their horses in front of him, ready to find the boy. There had to be at least twenty men.  
  
The dread in the pit of Adam's stomach lessened slightly. The larger the posse, the more ground they could cover in less of a time. They now had an even greater chance of finding Joe alive.  
  
The dread came back in full force at the word "chance". There was still the possibility that they would only find Joe's body thrown heartlessly somewhere. That thought made him glad that their father wasn't there. The men of Virginia City, even if they were Ben's friends, did not need  
to see such a strong man fall apart. Ben wouldn't want them to either. Adam hoped that he was the one to be cursed with finding his little brother's body, if Joe was dead. Joe and Hoss were so close; Hoss wouldn't be able to take it. At least Adam would, or so he hoped, be  
able to hold any emotion until he was alone.  
  
But that was not what he should be thinking about! He needed to keep positive! Joe had to be alive. He had to. His father and brothers just wouldn't be able to handle it if he wasn't.  
  
"Adam," Hoss whispered harshly, "he's in the saloon." Adam looked at Hoss questioningly, only to notice how tense his younger brother looked. "Thomson, Adam. I'll never forget what he looked like. He's in the saloon!"  
  
A/N: And I believe that this is a perfect place for another chapter break. I know that my chapters seem to be getting shorter, but I want to keep putting out chapters weekly, and not have to stop for a few months. I must thank everyone who reviewed. I missed you all. Hope you liked this chapter, and the next one should be out before next week! Please leave a review!


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